Author: Maria Alfano
Your menopause libido could be causing your increased sex urges. They say men peak at 20 and women peak in their 40s. I’m pretty sure your partner is enjoying every moment of this new you and your sexy time together!
What is a sex surge you ask? Why does it happen? Men heading into their 40s and 50s experience a decrease in testosterone which can eventually lead to ED. It’s not a pleasant experience for them to not be able to enjoy their partner any longer.
Some women on the other hand get one last rush of their sex hormones (namely testosterone) prior to reaching menopause. The perimenopause phase is the first of the 3 phases of menopause. In preparation for the “change,” your body will produce more testosterone and thus, you are much more interested in sexual relations with your partner.
Desiring a little more sex than usual is not a bad thing since many women go the opposite way. Perimenopause is different for everyone. It typically starts in the mid-40s and can last up to 8 years before going into menopause.
Menopause Libido – Is There More Sexy Time In Your Future
Most posts online will tell you that your libido diminishes with menopause. This will be true at some point but I love how mpoweredwomen.com discussed the topic. This is exactly what happened to me. It could explain what you’re feeling too. Take advantage of this menopause libido because it sadly won’t last forever.
Perimenopause & I am always wet
Hormonal imbalances and vaginal lubrication can explain why you are always wet down there. The lubrication is meant to keep the vaginal walls moist and prevent itchiness. The fluid should be clear. Contact your doctor immediately if there is a color and foul smell as this could be a sign of infection.
More Sex During Menopause – Is It Normal
It is not unusual, in fact, it’s pretty common that women in their midlife tend to crave more sex than they did in their early 20s. Studies have shown that a woman’s sexual peak differs by individual and their circumstances. It can actually last a lot longer than one originally would think, starting in their late 20s and going well into their 50s.
- Aside from the extra hit of testosterone, women feel more at ease as empty nesters. There is no one to interrupt.
- They often don’t have the fear of an unwanted pregnancy since their periods are gone.
- Women at this stage of their lives tend to be more confident about themselves with their partners and have no limitations to how they will express themselves in the bedroom.
How to fix those libido killers
- Pain can accompany sex as women age. This is a normal thinning of the cervical lining and additional dryness as a result of lower estrogen levels. HRT (hormone replacement therapy) is a good way to medically pump more estrogen into your body. If you prefer not to opt for the HRT, then lubricants will be helpful. Have your partner apply the lube and have a good time doing it:-)
- Aging is something we all face but it doesn’t mean we have to stop living. You have heard that age is just a number and you’re as young as you feel. Well, that number shouldn’t affect your intimacy. There is no rule that says you must stop having sexual relations with your partner when you’re older.
- Distractions are the biggest mood busters. Stop thinking about the pile of laundry waiting for you, or the project you need to finish. Get out of your own head and focus on your and your husband’s pleasure.
- Stress is a huge issue in all aspects of your life. Make a pact with your honey that the outside world stays outside the bedroom doors. When those doors are closed nothing can come in and kill the sexy time vibe you are creating. Forget about what’s happening out there for a few minutes. It will still be there when you’re all done.
- Depression and anxiety are deep-rooted medical issues that should be addressed with your primary caregiver. Know that they can lead to a decline in performance for both of you.
Why did it suddenly stop
With the onset of menopause, your hormone production becomes so low that it’s almost non-existent. This leads to all kinds of issues for women. The one we focus on today is libido. Little to no testosterone means a reduced sexual urge. Testosterone drops because your estrogen levels drop during menopause.
Estrogen is responsible for ovulation and preparing your body for pregnancy (among other things). Since you no longer have enough eggs to make a baby, your body drastically reduces your estrogen production.
Uh-Oh – the Menopause libido stopped now what
Now is the time for you to get creative. Just because menopause killed what little (or a lot) sex drive you had left, doesn’t mean you crawl into a ball and die. You are still a vibrant, beautiful, and vital woman who can still have one heck of a massive “O” even after menopause. The worst thing in any relationship is being stagnant. If you’re used to having sex in the missionary position every Thursday night for the last umpteen years, then it becomes boring.
- Use sex toys – add a little spice to your life. Both of you can enjoy a little vibration therapy during your foreplay. Often the introduction of a third party in the bedroom is all it takes for you to get your mojo back.
- Dirty thoughts – just imagine what you would like to have happened to you and tell your hubby. There is nothing like having a fantasy come true. A woman’s mind is a powerful tool. Get it excited and she is putty in your hands.
- Different positions – There are so many ways to have an explosive sexual experience. Don’t be squeamish ladies. Experiment. If you’ve never tried the backdoor, then maybe it’s time you have a new port of entry to spice things up. Whatever position you can imagine, you can try. Some you will like and others not so much. Just the anticipation of a new position will get you moistened for the occasion.
- Exercise it – your vulva is a muscle and like all muscles in your body, the more you exercise, the better it feels and the more you want to use it.
How Often Should You Have Sex in Your 50s?
There is no rule that says you should be only having sex once a day, week, or month. Get yourself well-taken care of as often as you like and can stand it. If you are both thoroughly enjoying this time together who should be telling you to stop! No one!! Keep going. There is no shame in giving and getting sexual pleasure at any age. Couples can have sex well into their 80s if they are still physically able.
In Summary
Menopause libido varies for each woman. A small minority never experience their sexual peak. The rest of the female population harness the power that this phase of your life has given you. Take advantage of all the ways you can make things exciting again. There is more than one way to skin a cat (so the saying goes) and this means there is more than one way to get taken care of by your partner. Don’t be shy. Give it a try. If you hate, then move on to the next jaw-dropping, heart-racing experience.
We would love to hear from you. What has your menopause libido been like? Do you have any tips or tricks to share with our readers?